Truth or Dare
by bibliophileemily
Summary: Jade and Dist are stuck in a closet; what will they do to pass the time? Probably not what you're expecting!


Dist was having a good day; not only had he found his precious Jade, but Jade was actually talking--well, yelling at him. Dist didn't care.

"Dist, you idiot! How could you have gotten us locked in here?" Jade tried twisting the knob again, to no avail.

Dist sat on the floor, wringing his hands; he hadn't seen Jade this angry in a long time. He hoped Jade wouldn't hit him.

"It's no use," Jade said, sinking down to his heels. "We're stuck in here for now."

Dist quickly covered his face; his nose was starting to run with excitement. He was all alone with Jade, and they were locked in a closet.

"So," Jade said suddenly. "I guess we should do something to pass the time." He grinned somewhat sadistically at Dist. "Truth or dare?"

Dist blinked. "Truth?"

Jade pushed up his glasses and leaned back against the wall.

"When's the last time you got laid?"

Dist blushed; what the hell was Jade thinking?

"Um, three weeks ago," he muttered, blatantly lying.

"Oh?" Jade leered. "Really?"

"Yes!" Dist snapped. "Truth or dare?"

"Hmm…truth," Jade answered, tapping his fingers on his knee.

"Um…" Dist was frustrated. Here was a great chance to find out information about Jade, and his mind was going blank.

"Uh…" He scratched his head. "When was the last time _you_ got laid?"

"You copycat," Jade said, laughing. "Last month, I think." Dist's face fell; Jade wasn't lying.

His miserable thoughts were interrupted by Jade asking him again 'Truth or dare?' "Truth," Dist mumbled.

"What did you dream about last night?" Jade asked, without a trace of sarcasm in his voice. Dist gulped; Jade was most dangerous when he sounded serious.

"Um…rappigs," Dist answered—again dishonestly. He wasn't about to mention the sexy dream he'd had about Jade. "Truth or dare?"

"Truth," Dist breathed deeply, then asked the question he'd wanted to ask last time.

"What is your ideal partner like?" Dist held his breath, waiting.

"Hmm…" Jade leaned forward and fidgeted with his glasses. "Let's see…" He paused again. "I suppose he would have to be smart, a genius even," he began. Dist nearly jumped for joy: "he" was definitely a positive sign. Dist may have been effeminate, but he was still a man. And Dist was definitely smart; he and Jade had invented human replication together, and Dist _was_ a master fon mechanic.

"And," Jade continued, "he's a sharp dresser, with beautiful eyes hidden behind his glasses." By now, Dist's own eyes were huge; all of these could describe him!

"J-Jade…" he mumbled.

"What else?" Jade continued. "He's smart, handsome, deviously clever, popular with both men and women…how else to describe him?"

By now, Dist had stopped listening, convinced that Jade was talking about him.

"Jade, who is it?" he asked almost desperately.

"Ha ha ha!" Jade laughed in his distinctive way. "It's me, of course!"

Dist froze. "B-but—" Jade cut him off.

"Truth or dare, Dist." Dist swallowed and wiped his nose.

"Truth," he replied glumly.

"Who is your ideal lover?" Jade asked, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

Dist didn't even think.

"You."

Now it was Jade's turn to freeze.

"I didn't expect you to answer honestly," Jade said hollowly. Dist looked down at his knees, expecting Jade to get angry and start beating him.

He definitely didn't expect Jade to start laughing.

"Ha ha ha," Jade laughed as he stood up. "I'm glad you finally admitted to it, Dist."

"Huh?" Dist looked up, completely astonished and bewildered. "You knew?"

"Of course I did," Jade answered. "How could you expect me not to know when you're always following me around, always obsessing over me?" He brushed out the bottom of his jacket.

"Well, I also happen to know that you lied on your first two questions, so you're going to have to do two dares for me."

Dist gave Jade a look of pure terror.

"W-w-what do you mean?" Dist backed against the wall. "What do you want to me to do?"

Jade grinned evilly.

"I dare you to take off your shirt." Dist gaped for a moment, hardly believing his ears.

"Um…" Dist finally decided that speaking was too complicated a task for the moment and obediently removed his shirt. His cheeks were stained with a brilliant dark pink that also spread down over his chest. He kept staring down at his feet, too afraid to meet Jade's eyes.

"Ah, Dist-chan is blushing," Jade remarked. "Isn't he cute?" That just made Dist blush even harder. Jade had called him cute!

"Jade, do you—?"

"No talking!" Jade reprimanded. "You still have one more dare to do."

Dist swallowed; he was too afraid to hope that Jade wanted exactly what Dist wanted so badly.

"I dare you," Jade said, his evil smile growing larger, "to take off the rest of your clothes."

Dist immediately flushed bright red.

"J-Jade," he said, tears beginning to form in his eyes.

Dist had never undressed so quickly in his entire life; he stripped in silence, still avoiding Jade's gaze. Jade merely watched each article of clothing fall to the ground. Finally, Dist was completely naked in front of Jade.

"Hm…" Jade said pensively. "The glasses need to go too…" Dist took them off without complaint; instantly, the dark interior of the closet became a blur of shadows and shapes.

"Oh, Jade," he whispered. "I've wanted this for so long."

Suddenly, the door opened, casting bright light right on Dist's bare butt.

He whipped around, blearily trying to make out the shapes when three high-pitched shrieks rang out.

"Ewwww!" a voice that Dist recognized as Anise Tatlin's cried. "Dist is even creepier naked!"

Dist died a little inside. Jade had tricked him! He clenched his fists, ignoring the trail of snot coming out of his nose.

"Jade!" he yelled, but Jade had walked over to join Guy and Luke, who were ridiculing Dist's very private parts.

Dist was getting very angry by now; this whole time, Jade had been planning on making fun of him…he flung himself back into the closet, nose running with rage.

After the door slammed, the group burst into awkward laughter.

"Well I never…" Natalia started.

"_That _was certainly unexpected," Luke said, still trying to erase the image of a naked Dist from his mind.

There was a pause, broken only by Dist's muffled sniffling from the closet.

"Anyways, Colonel," Anise said mischievously, breaking the silence. "Why were you and Dist in the closet?"

"Yeah," Luke continued, "and why was he naked?"

Jade pushed his glasses up.

"None of your business; now, perhaps we should get something to eat," he said a little too cheerfully. Everyone mumbled in agreement and shuffled out of the room. Jade, however, stayed behind.

"Dist," he called, "are you still mad at me?" He knocked on the door.

"You know, I didn't set that up. It was really funny, but," he paused. "I didn't mean for that to happen."

No response came from the closet.

Jade sighed heavily, then took off his glasses. He deftly removed his gloves, then his military jacket. He struggled a bit with his tall boots, then pulled his socks off. The shirt went off next, then he dropped his trousers and stepped out of them.

"Dist, open the door," Jade commanded.

"No!" Dist yelled. "You're just going to make fun of me again! Stupid Jade..."

Jade just pushed the door open. Dist's eyes widened.

There stood all six feet and one inch of a completely naked Colonel Jade Curtiss.

Dist's jaw dropped.

"Jade…"

Jade smiled, a real smile this time, not the usually sadistic one.

"I owe you a dare, Dist," he said softly. "I lied on the last question."

* * *

**Author's Notes: Don't kill me for writing this! I know that the story flows a little weirdly, but I had to get it out of my system, especially with all the great JadexDist scenes in the Tales of the Abyss anime. Besides, there is a serious lack of JadexDist fan fictions, and as I'm greedily devouring every story I can get my hands on, I thought that it would be good to finally write down the stories I've been thinking up (meaning that there will be more JadexDist).  
**


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